I want to say hi today, hello! On this day when we celebrate the one my heart longs for, the one named Jesus, who was brought back from the dead and defeated death and sin forever. If you don’t know God, ask Him if He’s there, search for him, seek Him (Matthew 7:7). Even if you don’t know it, you need Him. Through Him is the only way you can be the person you were made to be, without the layers, without the hardness, without the sin and the shame and the guilt and the regrets, just you, with Him.
If you are grieving for any reason at the moment, I’m thinking about you and praying for you. In my opinion grief can be the most horrific pain imaginable and there are people who have lost a lot more than myself. God knows of and has experienced your pain and he cares, more than you can possibly imagine. He can be there with you through it.
There’s a lot of reasons for grief, but I’ve been thinking a lot about death as well as life over the past year or so. Dad died, then there were a couple of other incidents that really got me talking to God and thinking. Thinking about what I want my life to look like, what it should look like, what is important? Why am I here? What does God want for me? Is he really there? What does He want me/us to do? But also, how extremely, horrifically sad it is when you don’t know where someone is when they’ve died.
For example, someone I used to work with died, a former colleague kindly let me know. I was her boss, the nurse in charge of the team, so that got me thinking about how I’d treated her? Did I treat her well? Did I fuss about things that just didn’t matter? Did I show her love? The answer is probably far more than I realise, but the answer I’m aware of is; not always, no. So off I went to God asking Him to help me love people more, to make me more like Jesus, then all this virus stuff happened and made me think even more, then I read a book about near death experiences and it was just so good to read about people’s experiences. Experiences of God asking ‘what did you do with the life I gave you?’, giving them their life journey flashback so to speak, God asking ‘how have you loved those I’ve given you?’ Images of heaven, a real glimpse into what we call the afterlife, but what I suspect is actually our real lives, the place we will be in for far longer than this world, the place my heart actually longs for, where we will actually be in the presence of God all the time, where his light will light everywhere, where there is no more pain, or death, or sin, where he wipes away every tear (this is in Revelation 21). Where we are free, just free, to be us.
This however only comes through us accepting God through Jesus as our saviour and Lord of our life. This may sound harsh or like an unjust condition, but it isn’t. God gave and gives us all life, every good and perfect gift is from Him (James 1:17), Jesus actually sustains all things.
He is the radiance of the glory of God and the exact imprint of his nature, and he upholds the universe by the word of his power. After making purification for sins, he sat down at the right hand of the Majesty on high (Hebrews 1:3).
The thing is, we have all gone wrong and He knows that, that’s why Jesus’ sacrifice was necessary. He changes everything once we come to Him, we can’t change through rules, but we can and do change through His love and sacrifice.
God loves you, he really, really, loves you, he hates sin but He loves you. I used to think I didn’t believe in God, but I did, I was just really, really, upset and angry at him, unjustly, I have to say, but I was and He can take that, tell Him how you feel and take it from there.
Sorry if anyone feels this is lacking anything, I just write from my heart, the heart that God changed. I’m becoming more and more aware of how much I just do not know about God and His ways, but what I do know a little of is God’s love and it is perfect, lacking in nothing. The best is yet to come, should you choose to accept this mission…
Goodbye for now.