God stepped down and lifted me up.

I wasn’t going to do another one today but I’ve just realised courtesy of Facebook memories that I was saved by Jesus/born again/gave my life (whatever you want to call it) 11 years ago today.

That got me thinking, I thought I’d go back over what happened that day, as far as I remember – it was 11 years ago…

I’d been to church that morning, since going to my friends daughter’s dedication, I’d been back a few times I think. I’d go to their house first and walk to church with them. I don’t think I would have had the bottle to go otherwise. Going made me very jittery/nervous, but I REALLY wanted to go. As I walked in, or even along the road I would feel my heart hammering.

I remember when I first went and I felt like people could see into the very depths of my soul… like they could see all the filth inside of me, all the bad thoughts, wrong actions, stuff.. I became very, very aware of it all. Of course, they couldn’t, I hadn’t actually met many nicer and more friendly people, but God was making me aware of why I needed Him I think.

Anyway, I’d been and come home and I’d been sinking into depressions quite a lot, I went up to bed for the afternoon trying to hide from everything under the covers…hibernation mode.. when the words to one of the worship songs kept going round and round in my head “God stepped down and lifted me up, God stepped down and lifted me up”. Over and over, I think it’s actually us not me in the song, but it was me he was saving… I kept trying to remember the rest of the words and couldn’t. I then remembered a booklet called ‘why Jesus’ someone at church had given me that morning. I read it, engrossed.. there was a prayer at the end..I said it..then there was the most amazing feeling. I was suddenly filled with energy, it was like I could bounce! I leapt out of my pit and contacted my friend to ask what had happened. She said if you said it and meant it, you’re a Christian! I was like, what? Really?

That was the first day of being saved, my first day of truly being alive, forgiven, made new.

It was amazing.

Thankyou my Jesus.


There’s been a few times recently when it’s started raining and J (4 year old) has exclaimed with great excitement “It’s raining! That’s great, that means there will be puddles for me to splash in”. It makes me smile every time.

I think I’d like that attitude towards life please.

Thank You

I’m sat here in our wood, looking up at the mountains in the distance, thinking, this is so beautiful.

I am very thankful for what we’ve got (depending what day it is sometimes), for where we are, for how life’s turned out so far… most of the time anyway. But! If we are only thankful for things like that, for things we are given, for where we are, for what we have… what happens when things go wrong? Do we stop thanking? Do we think God has gone wrong somewhere? No! Because thankfulness goes so much deeper than that.

I am thankful that Jesus saved me, and that He created me in the first place. The term ‘saved’ seems so simple when I first say it but it’s actually so complex when I look at it in detail.

Why am i saved? What am I saved from? There’s the question.

The bible says before we know Jesus as our saviour, we are dead in our ‘trespasses and sins’ (Ephesians 2:1) – children of wrath! And that’s all of us, not some. There aren’t a few lucky, holy ones. Everyone sins/does things wrong and falls short of Gods standards (Romans 3:23). we are born like it, wrongdoers.. No one can make their life right and to know their true meaning without God.

Jesus died in our place, He took our sins, our illnesses, our fear, guilt, shame, Everything! So they can be wiped out and for us to have new life, new beginnings and a new future. We are forgiven no matter what! we will be with Him when we die! He took our deserved punishment, so when we come back to him, we are made into new creations, alive with him, with a new spirit and purpose and hope.

That is what I am thankful for today.

but this is very nice too, Thankyou..

So here’s a funny story..

The other evening we’d run Chris’s bath in the kitchen and I was in the dining room talking to him before he got into it. I’d presumed that littlest and J were in the living room watching TV. Chris then walked into the kitchen and said, Cathy, come and look at this…littlest (almost 2 year old) was stood up in the bath with nothing on but his very expanded nappy (it was down by his knees) and one blue welly. He took absolutely no notice of us coming in and kept on doing what he was doing. Which was basically stood in a plaster bath full of water with a nappy and one welly on, talking to himself and splashing. He is very funny.

The second story is just a very short one….My head’s been itching a lot (no I haven’t got nits again) and so I’ve decided to go a bit more natural with my hair washing and conditioning and have been using bicarb to wash with and then a cider vinegar rinse. It’s worked surprisingly well so far (and doesn’t particularly smell). This morning I decided it would be good to use a bit of sunflower oil to condition my hair (it was a bit of a random looking around the kitchen and what have I got idea) and since then I have been looking as if I’ve put wet look gel on. I tried to wash it out but it obviously hasn’t worked. Thankfully I haven’t been out anywhere or seen anyone. Chris got back in and asked if it was sweat?? because I’d been working so hard on the garden….

The photo doesn’t actually look tooooooo bad but this is it:


The last thing is, after what seems like months, the patch of soil at the side of the house is ready for planting, yes! We’re still going to try the bee friendly flower seeds and hope they come up and it isn’t too late. It’s been such hard work but definitely worth it.

We’ve found loads of bottles whilst digging but unfortunately there’s also loads of broken glass, which really gets on my nerves because I keep finding it where the kids play too. I’m in the process of gathering it whenever I see any and have a few bags full of it so far.

Lots like this..
Just some of our bottles.


I had a bit of a profound spiritual experience today. Spiritual as in about Jesus. I’m going to mention it as a marker but unusually I’m unsure whether to actually talk about it in detail.

What I will do is put this photo up:

and then wait and see what God says or does really. It’s actually quite difficult to explain.

I didn’t actually know what cathartic meant until 11 years ago when I was saved by Jesus and a counsellor told me I’d had a ‘cathartic experience’. I googled it and found out what it meant and yes, I had (and possibly have had again).

What I will say is, when I saw this today, I wanted to sit at his feet and just gaze at him. Talk about drawn. Anyway, that’s it for now.

Good night.


The bathroom…

Yes we (royal we) have started the bathroom… Chris, as I write, is on his knees, cutting tiles to put around the edges. There’s dust and water flying everywhere. It’s so exciting!

Early stages..

And Chris has done such a good job. I’m very thankful that he is so practical. We also ordered the bath! Yes, a bath! a bath!

Busy brain.

Aah so much I could write about at the moment.. I have a busy brain… so much going on but also not much?!

I could talk about the garden, the house, the fact that we seem to have acquired a mouse and need to trap it… the kids and the fact that the Irish schools have already broken up for the summer.. or seem to have done.. the question of do we send J to school in September or have another pre-school year.. the fact that almost everyone you ever speak to about this, doesn’t listen but pours forth their views… The issue of how hard it is to get a routine during the day when there’s so much work to do in the garden/house etc, the issue of am I not looking after my kids properly because I don’t organise them like that??!! They seem pretty happy most of the time..

So much stuff in my head! And a lot more complicated than that too, but I’m not going into every detail… I also am struggling with my energy levels..I don’t know why..

I’m not stupid, I know our life is pretty good, I know a lot of it doesn’t matter, it’s just I do have a busy, analytical brain that thinks and thinks and thinks and thinks and thinks… so I’ve decided to do a mission statement about the basics of my life and take it from there and here it is:

God – I want to be your girl and that’s it.

To know your love so deeply and sweetly that nothing else matters and everything comes from that place.


see, nothing about ‘stuff’, just my busy brain being soothed and comforted by the knowledge of my saviour.

Take it from there…

‘Bless the Lord oh my soul, and all that is within me, bless his holy name’

Ps 103:1.

We got a caravan.


it’s lovely. We now have room for people to stop over if they don’t mind roughing it a bit… it’s got power, but no water supply yet. I love it. Its so peaceful to sit in. And clean and tidy to say it’s 20 years old. J loves it too and keeps wanting ‘caravan parties’, which consists of taking our meals into the caravan.

I’m currently sat in it with littlest. J is at pre-school for the morning. I can hear the birds singing and see the sheep in the next field. It’s like a little island of peace compared to the house at the moment. Prayer room too 👍.

I’ve always wanted one since I was a kid. (Weird I know). God gives good gifts, not just what you might expect. I should know that by now, but He still surprises me.

Exploring a little..

The last few days have been better weather, so I’ve managed to sort out the flower beds on the front and put some more plants in. Some dianthus, dahlias, the rest of the sweet peas and we were given by some neighbours a few broccoli, a sprout plant and some pumpkins, so they’ve gone in (on the back, not front). Apparently it is back to rain again this week so I’m glad I managed it. They’ll be well watered.

We’ve been up north twice this week to go shopping and to a garden centre. We’re only about half an hour or so from the border. I still find borders bizarre. You can actually jump from the uk (Northern Ireland) to the Republic of Ireland and then back again – Northern Ireland/Republic of Ireland. Man made borders… I don’t think God sees borders. He just sees people. I may be theologically wrong, but it’s how I see it. He sees people who he made for Him, people who are meant for Him. He is why we are here in the first place and He is who we are seeking whether we know it or not.

On the way back we stopped off at J’s request at a park in Blacklion:

Quite a view you get! It’s at Lough Macnean and there’s even a little beach type area that I didn’t know about:

We will definitely be going back. There was a sculpture there too:

You can see a little island through the holes, apparently it’s called a ‘crannog’. A man made island from a long time ago.

It was a good day.

Bath in the kitchen anyone?

I’d just finished having my bath in the kitchen last night and was stood up in the bath (with a towel round me) ladling the water out into the sink (very undignified), when there’s a knock at the front door and the handle begins to turn, the door starts to open and the dog half disappears through the door. I’m stood there panicking (In my towel) going ‘no no no no stop… (bear in mind I didn’t actually know who was there either), the visitor who turned out to be a neighbour is there with the dog half shut in the door. I ran off into the bathroom and Chris came to sort it out.

The dog got imprisoned in his cage, the (very nice) neighbour (who had chocolates for the children) got let in, I had to come back through the kitchen in my towel because the bathroom is downstairs. I said hello with a very big grin, had a quick chat and then scarpered upstairs. Whilst Chris said hi and chatted for a while.

The perils of bathing in the kitchen 😂. Maybe I should lock the door!?

it was good to see her though.. after the initial shock! Having a bath in the bathroom will be so good..